Cranky People
by fatemates
Summary: Two foreign girls stranded in the USA, try to survive the zombie apocalypse with out too much skills. With a bad attitude and a lot lotta good luck they might just make it. (Rating might go up due to language.)


A/N: It's our first fanfic so we hope you like it and let us know what you think. We were quite nervous to post it.

Disclaimer: We don't own the walking dead. If we did then this would not be a fanfic.

* * *

"Sam stop the car." Kate said turning around to her dark haired friend.  
"Why?" The latter asked annoyed as she kept on driving.  
"I need to fucking pee." Sam let out a frustrated sigh and looked at Kate with an unpleased look on her face.  
"Fine." she grumbled. "Just hurry up."  
Slowing down the car she looked around the area they were driving. She quickly came to the conclusion this was not what she would deem a perfectly safe spot… but then again what was now a days? There were trees on both sides of the road, the sun was low in the sky, it was the perfect time for walkers to start roaming around the area.  
Sam stopped the car abruptly.  
"Get out here and don't wonder."  
"Oh well thank you…" Kate said with a bit of annoyance and hopped out of the car grabbing the sword that was perched conveniently in between them.  
"Don't worry I will bring your sword and myself back alive."  
"Yeah whatever, just hurry the fuck up." Sam waved a hand at her friend, "I need to pee too."  
Gritting her teeth she tried to ignore the eerie feeling settling in her gut. She hated stopping on this road already.  
Kate closed the door of the car just as Sam got out to stretch her legs after the long drive. She nodded and quickly walked towards the forest disappearing between the trees.  
The road was quiet and there was nothing in site but trees and the empty concrete stretching out into the distance. Sam sighed, retrieving bow and arrows from the back seat just incase of emergency.  
"Why the fuck did she have to take piss in the bushes?" she said cursing under her breath. Both girls had been surviving on the road for a while now and they were just about ready to kill each other. Even though they were best friends, living together in a car with no privacy at all was taking its toll on both of them. Both found it surprising they hadn't killed each other yet.

After a few more minutes passed by Sam got fed up with waiting. About to turn around and head into the bushes herself she stopped when Kate emerged from between the trees with a huge shit-eating grin on her face.  
"You will never believe what I just found."  
"A fucking toilet?" Sam asked unimpressed.  
"No. That's not it, I think it will have one though. I found a house not too big, it seemed safe on the outside. We could clear it out easily if we need to, we will only stay there for a night or two. What do you think?"  
"So it's safe."  
"No… I just said it seemed safe, and I think we are capable enough to take out zombies if they are in there."  
Sam crossed her arms and raised her eyebrow. "You sure about that."  
"Look we have stayed in this car for I don't know how long and…"  
"Okay. Geez. Fine." Caving with a sigh Sam got back into the car. "If there are any corpses in there, you're getting rid of them, got it?" Kate nodded in response.  
"Sorry for snapping at ya…"  
"No biggie."  
"SPACE!" Kate said cheerfully hopping back into the car before they carefully made their way down the dirt road towards the house.

The small house, looking run down at first, looked surprisingly intact, as they got closer. Parking the SUV, out of site, behind the house. They carefully got out of the car and readied their weapons. Cautiously they made their way into the house, weapons drawn, scoping the rooms. After thoroughly searching through every nook and cranny they were pleased to discover it was void of walkers. The worst thing they had spotted in the moist little house was the fungus on the ceiling and walls, but they weren't complaining.  
They made their way onto the kitchen and started looting the cupboards and storage closet for canned foods.  
"Eeeeewwwww!" Kate exclaimed shooting an arrow at something moving in the corner of her eye. She scrunched up her nose as she held a killed rat up at its tail.  
"That's just fucking disgusting."  
Sam shrugged opening a can of baked beans and putting it out on the counter.  
"I guess it's gross, but at least we can eat the meat." she said as she looked around the small kitchen readying a small area for a small fire.  
"You have fun cooking. I am gonna go pee."  
"Go ahead, I know you can do it! I will load the cans we aren't going to use in the SUV just in case." Nodding she left Kate in the kitchen in search of a bathroom. Getting as many cans she could carry Kate quickly made her way outside towards the SUV, breathing in the fresh air. The house was incredibly warm and humid, but at least they had some space again.

Kate had finally started cooking when Sam got back from the bathroom.  
"How was your shit?"  
"Smelly…"  
"Sam please tell me you were able to flush it?"  
"No. Kind of hard with out running water."  
"Ah fuck!"  
They burst out laughing and made sure the bathroom door was closed tight. They settled down and had rat with baked beans for dinner. It normally this wouldn't seem like much, however it was more than they had had since a long time.

The sun had set. After checking all windows and doors were still firmly locked they headed upstairs. From the bedroom window they could see the SUV. The roof of the vehicle being high enough that if an emergency occurred, they could easily jump out. The plan wasn't perfect, but it would do fine in a worst-case scenario.  
The old mattresses under the sleeping bags felt like heaven. Even though they were raunchy and moist anything was better compared to another night of sleeping on the hard leather seats of the SUV.  
"Slaap lekker." (Sleep well) Kate mumbled in Dutch as she rolled around in her sleeping bag,  
"Jij ook..." (You too)

* * *

Kate's eyes fluttered open, the sun shone through the windows and had clearly been up for a while.  
"Ahh shit.." before she could start swearing heavily in Dutch she heard 2 voices coming from downstairs.  
"Seems like people scavenged 'ere before." a man's voice with a strong southern accent could be heard talking from the direction of the kitchen. She got up as quietly as possibly and moved over to her friend.  
"Sam, Sam…." She nudged her shoulder. "Seriously wake the fuck up!" she hissed. And kicked the other girl in the ribs. The other girl got up pissed off pushing Kate to the ground.  
"Fucker." She mumbled still half asleep. How ever before she could rip her friends head off she noticed the worried expression on Kate's face.  
"People in the house..." Kate softly mumbled getting up and grabbing her bow and arrow.  
"Fuck." Sam grabbed her sword and tiptoeing closer to the door careful not to make the floor boards creak too much.  
"I'm goin' up. See if there's anything up there worth takin'." The same voice said to which both girls heard a grunt in reply. The stairs creaked and Kate readied her bow  
"Talk first or..?" Kate mouthed, Sam nodded in reply.  
There was always an uncertainty when it came to other survivors. Most of them were bat shit crazy and better not to be met or messed with.  
Suddenly the door slammed open against the wall after being kicked open, revealing a muscular guy, his crossbow perfectly aimed at Kate who was so shell shocked she didn't even dare move a muscle. Sam's hands started to itch and she raised her sword as a silent threat. She had no problems forcing it through his jugular is if he did so much as try anything.  
"Drop yer weapons." He said in a gruff voice. How ever both girls refused to move.  
"Like that's gonna happen…" Sam glared at the man taking a step towards him cautiously.  
"Lower your crossbow first, I think it wouldn't be wise for us to try anything anyways, I have the feeling I will regret if I do." Kate said surprised that everything came out in a nice even calm voice.  
The man grunted and Sam rolled her eyes at her friend's willingness to fold.  
"What's going on up there baby brotha?" A voice hollered from downstairs and they heard heavy footsteps coming up.  
"Two girls in 'ere." the man in front of them said. A few moments later another man revealed himself,gun drawn, his bulky mass nearly filling up the entire door frame.  
"You got to be shitting me." Sam said in an annoyed voice lowering her sword ever so slightly, now more aware of the threat in front of them.  
"Well look at them little girls." He said with a smirk on his face. "Why don't you lower you weapons? So we can have a little chat huh?"  
"How is this for talking; my fist, your face." Sam growled defensively giving him a deadly glare.  
"How about that… We got ourselves a little spitfire."  
"Sam…. Ik denk niet dat dit verstandig is." (I don't think this is wise) Both men looked at Kate in confusion, Sam turning to glare at her instead.  
"Don't shoot the messenger, I am just trying to survive in here."  
"Sorry hun, I am not going to be two-bit hooker for no one. I'm a classy brawd; at least a dinner and a date, and then we can talk." She replied sarcastically before huffing and sending the men another glance.  
"Talk."  
She then turned around and sat herself down on he windowsill. Putting down her sword next to her she took out her Iphone. Even though she could only charge it in the car due to the solar panels, and there was no network connection, it still played music and games.  
"Serieus…!?" (seriously!?)

Bird like sounds suddenly filled the room "Prrrrrrrrrrrr-poof prrrrrrrrrrr prrrrrrrrrr poof!"  
The small group all turned to look at the loud mouthed girl who just continued to play her Brizzle game not even looking up.  
"Sam turn the sound off…please." Sam let out an annoyed sigh and suddenly everything turned silent.  
"We ain't got time for this…" The crossbow guys said getting a little bit impatient.  
"Hold on for a goddamn moment." Kate interrupted him and took a deep breath. She had the feeling things where not going into the desired direction.  
"We are all trying to survive here in this motherfucking shit hole….I just wanna get the fuck out of here alive. Now." She lowered her bow looking at the two men.  
"No shit sherlock." Sam mumbled stuffing her phone back into her bag and doing the same. She caught the eye of the older of the two who then winked at her before looking back at the shorter blond as she started getting to pack her bag.  
"Sure thing sugar-tits, why don't ya'll come along with us?" He said trying to be smooth but failed miserably.  
"Ahh thank you," Kate replied sarcastically looking at her chest  
"…I didn't know I had them!"  
"Sam gaan we met ze mee?" (are we going to go with them?)  
"Sure, but here is the deal: you teach us how to handle a gun, and swear to God; No fuckin' funny business. Not if your attached to your little friend."  
"Shit man… they don't even know how to shoot."  
"Blame my fucking government for it, not me." Kate interrupted. "But we do have them with plenty of ammo and a bunch of other supplies." Now they both looked interested.  
"We will take you along, as long you don't pull all your woman crap on us." The older of the two said looking the girls up and down.  
"No problem, my brother told me I sucked being a girl. So we will be just fine." The brunette replied with a wink.  
"That's settled then?" Kate asked looking at the oddly formed group.  
"That's a yes." Sam stated after a slightly awkward silence. "My name is Sam, and that is Kate." She said walking towards the men with her pack slung over her shoulder and sword in hand.  
The older two of the two men smirked at them, eyeing them up and down.  
"Well then this 's my baby brotha Daryl. I'm Merle."


End file.
